Dumb news stories

[Eric Cartman]

On April 23, 2024, police were dispatched to the Family Fare grocery store in Midland, MI, to investigate a suspicious incident. The store manager reported that a contractor working on the roof had stumbled upon a 34-year-old woman, known as the 'roof ninja,' residing inside the store's rooftop sign. The sign had been transformed into a mini-apartment, containing items such as a printer, pantry, desk, and coffee maker. It was subsequently discovered that she had been residing there for quite a while.